Always/Allways

Many think of "always" as a synonym for "forever".
What if it is not referring to time but to "all ways"?

How do we love someone in all ways?

When two people fall in love, they initially love each other in all ways.
As the days pass, one may discover the other does something they may not like. They may decide that when the beloved does it, it is cute. Not too likely? This is an opportunity.

One may look at what is not liked and determine why one does not like it. One may decide to continue loving the other person in spite of the unliked trait. One makes a conscious decision to love the other along with the unliked habit.

When one decides to love another with all their perceived and unknown faults, (and aware of one's own) one is loving in "all" ways. We may discover that we have made a significant change in our self. Deciding to love another, in spite of any traits or habits the person may have that we may dislike, may require us to separate our dislike from the loving of that person. We are naturally no longer judgmental. We are learning to love without judgment. This may be the beginning of unconditional love.

Parents, on the hand, are delighted with caring for a newborn. However, there are always times when one is not well rested. Parents learn this early on. We all know of instances of infants waking parents who have been sleeping through the child's fussing until the child is screaming. Classic case of changing one's own behavior to change another.

Parent love their newborn child in all ways. Infants have certain uncomfortable actions like waking up at all hours whenever there is a discomfort such as being hungry or wishing to be held or to be dry. This may be very inconvenient but the parent takes care of the need anyway. And loves the child. Not doing so is considered abnormal.

When a child does something considered unacceptable, the parent is challenged to find a way to have the child not continue the behavior. Parents sometimes amaze them selves in their creativity and success. Parents may quickly learn that the child will do whatever the child sees the parents do. The wise parent learns to change self.

This may reveal another category of actions that may be disliked. A parent may now find there are two people doing an unliked action. A bigger challenge. This may be an opportunity to learn that the quickest way to change another is to change self. One of the most effective ways to change self is to say thank you when another does something we don't like. If one is cut off in traffic, e. g., a natural reaction is anger. When one responds "thank you", this short circuits the anger. One automatically feels better expressing gratitude as it raises our frequency. Try it. Observe self.

Stepping back and observing our reactions may further change our own behavior. When we love another, we automatically raise our own frequency. This increases our creativity. We are better able to see how to deal with a challenge if the challenge is a habit of another we find annoying. It does no good to say nothing without changing our own feelings. We may build up our annoyance until we erupt and it won't be pretty.

What do we do? Accepting that this is what they do helps.

Reminding self of how we love the other also helps. Speaking calmly with the other about the action in a non-judgmental way, such as asking them why they do it, may help.

This writer has a friend who always uses foul language. Everyone knows he doesn't mean to be negative but he regularly sees when people lie and/or are not being honest and he expresses it in this way. It was quickly seen that the best way to deal with this is to accept him as he is and do what can be done to correct the situations to which he objects. This calms him down and decreases the use.

When one shares energy with a partner, the exchange causes an ever increasing pool of energy to be shared. The flow between the two is a dynamic exchange. One barely thinks of the other to trigger sharing. This energy is available to be used in whatever dimensions the pair shifts into individually or together.

Lovers are better able to see how they may work together. The energy can be used by one to help the other in simple physical ways or in all ways, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Energy can be applied with a simple thought.

Many are familiar with the idea of falling in love. We meet someone and there's instant attraction, an instant liking. Then we get to know them better. We may find there's 1 or 2 things we may not like so much. Our decision now affects the quality of the relationship and the relationship itself. We can decide to accept the person the way they are and have a very good relationship. Or not.

Another possibility is much less common. This writer was asked if she would love a certain one. He had taken on a certain job. After considering she agreed. Then she was asked if she would accept certain conditions. One was to love unconditionally. That was easy. The next was not so easy. Again, she considered and agreed. Once agreeing, she instantly felt herself shifting. She was in love.

As time went on she found it easier and easier to do as she had promised. There were few instances where it was a challenge. It was a joy.

And the love between them grew exponentially. She enjoyed seeing the changes in the man as he adjusted to the relationship.

Our choice.